Watch out for the sh*t!
Where do I begin? The sh*t has really hit the fan big time here!
TSS only agreed to sign the divorce decree originally after E agreed to giving her $800 a month in Child Support (DOUBLE what he should have had to pay). We knew we could get it lowered by saying change of circumstances, lifestyle change, lower wage etc but it could take time. For eleven months out of 2004, he coughed up $800 and we went short because of it.
In December of 2004, he lost the job that he secured when we first came over. We had just moved into a new apartment and I wasn't legally allowed to work at that point. Luckily, he managed to get a job working for a temp agency, but in the mean time, we'd fallen behind whilst he was out of work with ALL of our bills. The only thing we kept on top of was our rent.
The longer it went on, the more we knew we had to get the child support lowered for us to survive. He sent all the paperwork in to the Office of the Attorney General who handle the collection of Child Support here in Texas. We heard nothing back. All that would come through, was demands for $800 a month which we didn't have.
Last January, E went to file his tax return for 2004 and was told he could not claim the kids as an exemption because TSS had got in before him, claimed SOLE financial responsibility and neglected to mention the $800 a month she had received for the 11months out of that year. She got a nice healthy $6000 tax return for the pathetic TWO months out of the year that she had actually worked! We ended up with $1500 and couldn't even claim $0.01 for C's upkeep as she was not fully immigrated at that point and didn't have a social security number. We tried to appeal it with the tax office and told them that she had fraudulently filed. They said they would look into it, we heard nothing more about it.
Recently, the OAG have been sending letters and calling asking for his employment details to start making deductions from his pay. It cause fight after fight between us, as I stated it would only make things worse if he ignored it. He stated that if they started taking the $800 a month out of his wages, we would not get the mortgage on the house and it would all fall through. I suggested that we ask TSS to make some kind of compromise and reduce the child support to a more realistic figure (like $400 which is what it should have been all along) and that in return, when MY compensation money came through for the accident, we would pay off the arrears in one lump sum and once we moved into the house we take the kids every other weekend from Friday-Sunday night like she wants us to now (yes, in a 2 bed apartment with no beds).
Well last night, just before dinner, the sh*t hit the fan. TSS calls up screaming down the phone that the OAG have finally found out where he works and that they are going to start deductions from his next paycheck for $955 a month. That's our mortgage payment right there, and on top of that, we still have to live. I am not physically able to work right now and we are scared we will lose out on the house deal because of this mess. Yes we can appeal it and get it lowered, but if we go through the OAG, it could take up to 6 months. They IGNORED the original paperwork he sent in, saying it was incomplete (despite him sending in paychecks, rent statements and everything).
We confronted her about her weekend activities when we are looking after the children and told her that despite what she says, we KNOW she has been doing drugs and does nothing but lie to us about her whereabouts. Take this weekend for example: she asked us back in December if we could take them for the weekend because she was flying up to Massachusetts for a friend's wedding. I since found out, she is meeting up with some guy she has been scr*wing that she met online who she spent four days with in a hotel here back in August. She went silent when E told her he knew about what she was REALLY doing this weekend.
I emailed a lawyer firm last night and am hoping they can help us out. She has her rent paid for her by her parents and is working full time. She pays NO child care costs and snorts most of her cash up her nose. Would YOU be happy about supplying her with $800 a month to support her habit?
Luckily, on the good side, they cannot legally deduct more than 50% of his net pay. Even so, it will leave us short and we may lose out on the house anyway.
We are at our wits end and had an awful night's sleep.
The lawyer firm I emailed last night have called me back. They think we have a good case. The downside is they want $200 just to see us on the first appointment. Who knows how much it may run into when the real sh*t starts. *sigh* I have emailed some more laywers (another 12 to be precise) and will see who gets back to us with what answers by lunchtime. If we don't hear back by lunch, E wants me to arrange to see the first lawyer and see what they come back with.
This is all so unfair.
TSS only agreed to sign the divorce decree originally after E agreed to giving her $800 a month in Child Support (DOUBLE what he should have had to pay). We knew we could get it lowered by saying change of circumstances, lifestyle change, lower wage etc but it could take time. For eleven months out of 2004, he coughed up $800 and we went short because of it.
In December of 2004, he lost the job that he secured when we first came over. We had just moved into a new apartment and I wasn't legally allowed to work at that point. Luckily, he managed to get a job working for a temp agency, but in the mean time, we'd fallen behind whilst he was out of work with ALL of our bills. The only thing we kept on top of was our rent.
The longer it went on, the more we knew we had to get the child support lowered for us to survive. He sent all the paperwork in to the Office of the Attorney General who handle the collection of Child Support here in Texas. We heard nothing back. All that would come through, was demands for $800 a month which we didn't have.
Last January, E went to file his tax return for 2004 and was told he could not claim the kids as an exemption because TSS had got in before him, claimed SOLE financial responsibility and neglected to mention the $800 a month she had received for the 11months out of that year. She got a nice healthy $6000 tax return for the pathetic TWO months out of the year that she had actually worked! We ended up with $1500 and couldn't even claim $0.01 for C's upkeep as she was not fully immigrated at that point and didn't have a social security number. We tried to appeal it with the tax office and told them that she had fraudulently filed. They said they would look into it, we heard nothing more about it.
Recently, the OAG have been sending letters and calling asking for his employment details to start making deductions from his pay. It cause fight after fight between us, as I stated it would only make things worse if he ignored it. He stated that if they started taking the $800 a month out of his wages, we would not get the mortgage on the house and it would all fall through. I suggested that we ask TSS to make some kind of compromise and reduce the child support to a more realistic figure (like $400 which is what it should have been all along) and that in return, when MY compensation money came through for the accident, we would pay off the arrears in one lump sum and once we moved into the house we take the kids every other weekend from Friday-Sunday night like she wants us to now (yes, in a 2 bed apartment with no beds).
Well last night, just before dinner, the sh*t hit the fan. TSS calls up screaming down the phone that the OAG have finally found out where he works and that they are going to start deductions from his next paycheck for $955 a month. That's our mortgage payment right there, and on top of that, we still have to live. I am not physically able to work right now and we are scared we will lose out on the house deal because of this mess. Yes we can appeal it and get it lowered, but if we go through the OAG, it could take up to 6 months. They IGNORED the original paperwork he sent in, saying it was incomplete (despite him sending in paychecks, rent statements and everything).
We confronted her about her weekend activities when we are looking after the children and told her that despite what she says, we KNOW she has been doing drugs and does nothing but lie to us about her whereabouts. Take this weekend for example: she asked us back in December if we could take them for the weekend because she was flying up to Massachusetts for a friend's wedding. I since found out, she is meeting up with some guy she has been scr*wing that she met online who she spent four days with in a hotel here back in August. She went silent when E told her he knew about what she was REALLY doing this weekend.
I emailed a lawyer firm last night and am hoping they can help us out. She has her rent paid for her by her parents and is working full time. She pays NO child care costs and snorts most of her cash up her nose. Would YOU be happy about supplying her with $800 a month to support her habit?
Luckily, on the good side, they cannot legally deduct more than 50% of his net pay. Even so, it will leave us short and we may lose out on the house anyway.
We are at our wits end and had an awful night's sleep.
The lawyer firm I emailed last night have called me back. They think we have a good case. The downside is they want $200 just to see us on the first appointment. Who knows how much it may run into when the real sh*t starts. *sigh* I have emailed some more laywers (another 12 to be precise) and will see who gets back to us with what answers by lunchtime. If we don't hear back by lunch, E wants me to arrange to see the first lawyer and see what they come back with.
This is all so unfair.
posted by DenimRose at 8:04 AM
3 Comments:
Hey there - Sorry times are tough right now for you. It was hard to follow the post b/c I have to back-track in your blog to figure out who TSS is and so on, but what I did see was that you said it's costing $200 just to meet with a lawyer. There are many law firms out there that will take cases pro bono and you don't pay if you are qualified. You just have to find them and do a little digging online. Type in your city and "public defender" or "pro-bono law firm" and see if you can find anything. Wishing you the best from here in NYC...
Best of luck with your case. I think condom companies should print this story on the back of their boxes...it would really make a lot of people think twice!
Alyssa: Thanks sweetie. Things are really strained right now and today's the day we go see the lawyer. Apparently, we are above their criteria for legal aid. *shrugs* Yet according to the law of the land, officially, we are living below the poverty line. Go figure. I won't tell you what TSS stands for as it is extremely derogatory, and is only known to a few people. I KNOW what it stands for and it makes me chuckle when I think about it. Kind of like thinking of your potential employer at an interview to be naked!
Jay: Thanks so much for your support. It's hard and a lot of folk just see my husband as a dead beat dad, and he is far from that (he WANTS to support his children). We paid DOUBLE what the law requires for almost two years. She never acted resonsibly when she HAD the money. She ran up debt after debt and who did they come looking to to repay them? Yes, her ex husband because she used an expired military ID with an old APO address on it when trying to get credit and apartments and such. Who did the debt demands get forwarded onto after we left the UK base? Yep, my husband! So we KNOW that she is irresponsible when it comes to money and we know it would be supporting a drug habit. *sigh*
I will get off my soap box now! Thanks for visiting!
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